AEDM Day 15: Anger

by jenn on November 15, 2008

in Art,Art Every Day Month,Expressive Arts Coaching

expressive arts coaching - anger

The night was going along so well.  Made dinner and was having a mellow evening just vegging out with Brian.  Catching up on some TV and actually not working on a weekend.  Next thing I know we get into a tiff over something small that of course snowballs into something big.  (Funny, I think it started off with him reminding me that I have to do my art post for today and me complaining about how I didn’t want to do it!).  Snippy tones are used back and forth.  He leaves the room.  I get livid.

Now, anger is one of those emotions that we tend to stuff down.  Or we put entirely on other people rather than owning our part in it.  You know, “Oh, he made me soooo mad!”  When I’m coaching, I see clients not allow themselves to fully experience their anger.  Instead of the anger going away, it usually builds up until things get so bad they can’t take it anymore.  To practice giving ourselves permission to fully be with the anger and let it pass through us in a healthy way, I’ve screamed at the top of my lungs along with clients, we’ve stomped our feet on the ground together, we’ve punched pillows.  We usually end up laughing when we’re through, surprised at how good it feels to let it all out!

Remembering that, I spy my sneakers on the floor and get the impulse to pick one up and hurl it toward the floor.  Smack!  Ah, that felt good. I picked up the other one and threw it on the ground, too.  Thud! Wham!  I could feel the energy moving out of my body.

And then it dawned on me to express the rest of my lingering anger through art.  I unpeeled the wrapper on my red oil pastel so I could smear the whole thing on a big sheet of paper.  As I press the crayon hard onto the page, it snaps into smaller pieces.  I smear the crimson shards with my palm across the paper, feeling the heat build up from the friction.  I scratch my nails like claws down the page.  It’s a frenzy of color, lines and textures.  I finish it off by crumpling the paper into a ball with a grunt!

After all that, I do feel better.  There is a release and I am able to move on.  So, I should probably go upstairs and not only apologize to Brian but also thank him for reminding me the importance of doing my art!

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Jamie Lees November 16, 2008 at 6:46 am

Boys stink. Especially when they’re right.

Way to use that emotion Jennifer. It is something I have been trying to focus on in my art. I find for me the negative emotions easier to channel through my work than the positive ones. Does anyone else experience this?

AuthenticArtDC November 16, 2008 at 9:00 am

Good example of challenging negative emotions and enery into a creative form. I need to learn to do that more instead of slamming folks through emails!!!

deb November 16, 2008 at 9:19 am

… and such a vivid piece it is too. 🙂

leah November 16, 2008 at 9:58 am

you can feel the energy here!! so expressive!

beth November 16, 2008 at 10:29 am

i can relate, love the daily art. it sure is hard to be reminded to do something we don’t want to do. i hate it when someone gets in my space when i really already know what i should do. sorry always makes it better.

Ananda Leeke November 16, 2008 at 6:24 pm

I love the hot red. It says woman let it all out. Loud. Loud. Loud. It makes me think of how good it feels to say HAAAAAAAAAAAAAH loudly when you breathe out through your mouth. You go red hot momma artist.

Tania November 18, 2008 at 2:37 pm

I discoverd your blog some while ago.

Your scratch looks nice!
I should have done this earlier this evening when I was yelling at my friend through the phone. I did’nt think of it.

A time ago I was in much pain and I felt hate for the first time in my life towards some persons. To get ridd of it I used black on a big sheet of paper. After that I felt also better. You can use it as “Script As Method” (SAM), use colors on paper to express your feelings, you start with one thing and end with some other.

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