Last Friday through Sunday Brighid and I co-led the third retreat of the 2007 Cheryl’s Dreaming Big leadership program in Indiana. Our retreat kicked-off with some intense storming (literally – lots of thunder, wind and rain; and figuratively – lots of group tension and unresolved issues). I must say it was pretty exhausting and challenging to hold the space for this natural, yet difficult, phase in team development.
One thing that helped me get through it was walking through the labyrinth at the retreat center. Before entering the path, you can hold an intention or inquiry. For me it was around how can I stay with the mess of the storming phase. With every twist and turn, I questioned, “How much longer? When will this end? Where is this going?!” And then I relaxed into it and trusted that I would find my way to the center. I leaned into this insight throughout the weekend. Labyrinths are a great meditative and focusing tool. There’s this really cool portable labyrinth that I imagine would have a similar effect.
The other take-away I had from the retreat was remembering that the program we created is a great laboratory for learning and practicing leadership, not only for the participants, but for myself as a co-leader as well. Brighid kept reminding me of the lessons from an insightful book called Leadership and Self-Deception. This powerful parable reminds us to relate to people as people with hopes, dreams, needs, wants instead of objects or obstacles that our in our way. By shifting my perspective to being “out of the box” I was able to rise above the muck of the storming and group dynamics and reconnect to who these wonderful people are and what they have to offer. The other thing I kept coming back to was the idea that from the crap of group storming comes the fertilizer which nourishes the ground for a beautiful garden to grow. It’s a natural cycle.
How are you with conflict and tension? What are some ways that you move through the storming in your life? How has going through the muck helped new opportunities to blossom for you?
[tags]labyrinth, leadership, leadership and self-deception[/tags]
One of my favorite things to do is read (and nap!) in my hammock, especially on a gorgeous day like today. It’s like a little mini-vacation! I savor the cool breeze rustling through the leaves and the sunshine peaking through the trees branches overhead. My dog Emmett likes to join me outside, too (he’s known to sunbathe).
When my schedule gets overloaded with too many to-do’s and travel, I need to consciously take a break. Other clues include when I get cranky and impatient and start to feel resentful about all the stuff I have to do (oh, woe is me!). It’s not a pretty place to be. So what usually snaps me out of it is some nice, simple “me” time like a cat nap in my hammock.
The other day, I gave myself another mini-vacation by finally going for a swim at my local gym. They have a lovely outdoor pool and deck with a stunning view of the Bay. What a refreshing way to rejuvenate!
I know that when I take care of myself, I reconnect with my own creativity and I am able to be more available for other people. And that’s going to be really important given that I will be leading the third retreat for Cheryl’s Dreaming Big this coming weekend.
Here are a couple of great resources for creating your own mini-vacation:
What signs tell you when you need some breathing space? How do you recharge? What’s one, simple way you can you give yourself a mini-vacation this week?
[tags]breathing space, mini vacation, hammock, rest and relaxation[/tags]
I’ve had “get MBTI qualified” on my list of goals for several years now (if you haven’t guessed, that’s a dead give away that I’m definitely not a “J” – I like to keep things pretty open ended!). I’m happy to say that I’ve now finally bit the bullet and signed up for a training class in September.
I really started to get into type and temperament when Brian and I took a couples workshop in 1999 through Susan Nash, author of Turning Team Performance Inside Out. My friend Courtney introduced me to her back in our change management consulting days at Accenture while she was helping Susan co-author the book Dating, Mating and Relating. Brian and I learned so much about each other’s preferences and styles. That really helped shed light on the dynamics in our relationship and helped bring us closer together. We discovered that we don’t share any functions – he senses and I intuit, he thinks and I feel. Let’s just say this can make for interesting conversations and decision-making! So once we understood our natural modes of operating, we gained an appreciation for the different perspectives and strengths we both bring to the table.
I’ve started to bring MBTI into my coaching with clients who already know their type. We’ve uncovered lots of juicy insights about natural gifts and tendencies. Plus, it’s helped to shed light on places to grow into more. YOU: Being More Effective in Your MBTI Type is a great book that provides specific suggestions and development plans to be more effective on the job.
Some of my other favorite MBTI-related books are:
Being the INFP that I am, I’m always seeking to discover more about myself and to find meaning in the world around me. I want to make a positive difference according to my values and I want to help people. Given all that, it makes total sense that I’m pursuing this valuable personal growth tool and am wanting to share it with others.
[tags]MBTI, Myers-Briggs, temperament, personality types, INFP, life coaching, team building[/tags]
I’m a huge lulu lemon athletica fan. Their yoga clothes rock and I absolutely adore their manifesto. It’s inspiring, sassy, thoughtprovoking and cool. And it gave me fodder for my own creative project.
After recently reworking my life purpose statement, I also went back to update my detailed life plan. The plan is based on all facets of my life (career, health, money, relationships, etc.) and has actions and timelines for accomplishing my goals. I hadn’t looked at it in a while, so it was cool to see all the things that I could now check off. Like leaving my corporate job to go into business for myself, getting certified as a yoga instructor, and visiting Greece, Egypt and Turkey to name a few.
Reconnecting with my life plan energized me. I wanted a visual reminder of all the purpose statements I created for the different aspects of my life. The manifesto postcard proved to be the perfect medium. I did my own twist on it and am calling it a “woman”-ifesto! I’m going to put a few copies throughout my house to remind me of my vision.
What’s your “woman”-ifesto? How do you keep connected with your life purpose? What cues can you create to remind you of all the wonderful things you’re up to?
[tags]life purpose, life coaching, life plan, woman-ifesto, manifesto, art visioning[/tags]
I’m always raving to people about Ladies Who Launch. I just love the positive, creative vibe of this vibrant group of women. Last night was the Launch Party for the Silicon Valley chapter. There was a great turnout at the Bryant Street Gallery and a buzz of excitement in the air.
Allie is our fearless Bay Area leader and she has enough energy to light up San Francisco. When she asked me last month if I was interested in leading the Oakland chapter, I was certainly intrigued! I went right away to pick up the Ladies Who Launch book to refresh myself on the Incubator experience and get an even deeper look at what the organization is taking a stand for. I devoured the book in less than a day. With every page I turned I said, “Yes! This is such good stuff! I love it!” Their message of feminine leadership and intuition so resonates with my coaching and creativity work.
According to the founders’ research:
“Women want to feel fulfilled, have fun, enjoy their femininity, and not sacrifice these desires for financial success. Women are redefining the very notion of success as they incorporate many elements, not just career or family, and want to be able to celebrate their personal creativity in whatever manifestation that means… Women are natural connectors, they derive fulfillment from relationships, and use them to move forward and execute ideas…Women tend to treat creative projects and new businesses like their children: they become emotionally attached.”
Their approach to embracing the feminine gives us permission to really go for our dreams, ask for help along the way and celebrate the process!
Allie invited the four Bay Area leaders together this afternoon for our first team meeting. I’m super excited to be collaborating with these savvy, fun gals! I know I’ll learn a lot and will have a blast along the way. And I can’t wait to get started sharing with other women the magic of the Ladies Who Launch Incubator program! I’ve been saying to my husband that I’m always having to drive into the city for cool networking events. Well, as they say a complaint is usually a request in disguise, so I’m loving the opportunity to bring this nationally acclaimed way of “launching” to women in my neck of the woods.
[tags]Ladies Who Launch, Incubator, women entrepreneurs, Oakland[/tags]
